Breathless Read online

  On second thought, maybe he would leave her clothes on. God, he loved fucking her with her clothes on. He loved when she made it hard for him…in more ways than one.

  “I love you,” she murmured against his lips.

  “Love you, too.” Ever since the first time she’d dragged those words from his mouth, from his heart, he couldn’t stop telling her.

  “But you’re trying to change the subject with sex.”

  “Yeah?” he growled, taking another taste of her. “How am I doing?”

  “Hmm. Food debate, or sex…however shall I choose?”

  “I’ll choose for you.” Each word was punctuated with a heavenly mouthful of her. Her hair slid like silk around his fingers as he stroked up her back. She still trembled for him after all this time, and he still burned for her. He always would. This woman held all the power in the world to destroy him, and like an idiot he’d willingly given it to her—but even if someday she used it, he’d have no regrets.

  Her legs wrapped easily around his waist as he lifted her. They were old pros with each other’s bodies by now, yet nothing was old. Every breath, every quiver, every touch…it all felt brand new and all the more devastating for their shared prowess. Equally as hot and fierce or loving and tender whether they were in their bed or the shower or he had her bent over the kitchen island.

  Macy’s hands busily collected the feel of him, restlessly roaming over his bare shoulders, back, and arms, as if she couldn’t get enough. Even through their clothes, the heat of her pressed against his erection, rubbing deliciously, inciting him to madness. The only question was how he wanted to make her his today.

  He had an idea.

  “What are you doing?” she asked as he headed back toward the utility room…and the door leading to the garage.

  “You’ll see.”

  She did soon enough. Shrieking as he carried her out through the open garage door and the pouring rain hit their steaming skin like needlepoints, she clung harder, burying her face in his neck as he laughed. They had neighbors on all sides, but oh well, if they were nosy enough to watch them through their windows then they deserved whatever show they got. That had always been his philosophy, anyway.

  “Are you kidding me?” she cried as he carried her to the GTO parked in the driveway. He had to release one of her delectable ass cheeks to open the passenger door, but managed to hang on to her. “It’s chilly out here!”

  “I’ll warm you up.”

  “It’s broad daylight!”

  “It’s pouring rain. Get in.”

  God, he loved it when the words that came from her lips were unsure, but the fire in her eyes said only Do it, do it. Oh God, do it now.

  He’d seen the memories in her eyes earlier. Yeah, their inception had been here. This was where it all began: in his cramped backseat, struggling for the space to move together, so desperate for each other the discomfort hadn’t mattered because the pleasure eclipsed it. And while they hadn’t rocked the shocks back here since Valentine’s Day a couple of years back, he bet nothing had changed.

  Her breath hissed in as her bare legs touched the chilly upholstery. He closed the door behind him. Macy’s gaze devoured the movement of his hands as he wrenched his jeans open, her chest heaving. Then those hot hazel eyes flickered up to his, and he was lost. There was only time for him to yank the soft panels of fabric between her legs aside with one fist and give her slit a teasing, readying stroke with the head of his cock, knowing he could hurt her by shoving past her initial resistance before she was ready.

  But fuck, she was ready as always, wet and slick. She took him halfway with her head thrown back, her damp hair clutched in his other fist, her thighs shaking hard around his hips, before he pulled back and sank home with a groan.

  Home. It wasn’t just an expression. It was where he belonged, it was the place he’d spent his entire fucking life trying to find. He had it now. With her, he had it at last.

  “Seth,” she whimpered helplessly against his neck. Her use of his real name only fired him up more. At first, she’d only called him by his given name; now she rarely did. In public, around their friends, he was Ghost—it was only here, when it was the two of them in their little cocoon against the world, that she called him Seth, and he lived for hearing the syllable roll in sultry seduction off her tongue.

  “So beautiful,” he told her, watching a flush climb high in her cheeks. Drops of rain still clung to her skin and hair. Eyes dusky, locked on his and heavy-lidded with ecstasy, lips swollen and parted with the sharp breaths he pushed from her with every thrust. She enveloped him with heat and sweetness and trust and all kinds of shit he’d never thought to have. When it all became too much and he began to drop his head, her strong hands caught him and held him up. Made him stare into her eyes. Made him see the promise of forever there. He couldn’t deny that it scared the hell out of him, but he stared all the same.

  Knowing her cues, he could draw this out, make her cry out and beg and even curse him with the merest variation of movement. Oh, it was sweet, playing her body like his own instrument. Filing away any new discoveries for later use, pulling out old ones she might not have thought of in a while. A delectable game where they both won…though she usually reached the finish line long before he let himself.

  Her first orgasm rocked her before he’d worked up a sweat. He talked her through, dropping kisses along her jaw and biting at that exquisitely quivering bottom lip while her contractions coaxed him deeper and pulled at his sanity. So wet, fuck , so tight. She clutched at him anywhere she could find a grip, and the heels of her running shoes dug into his ass.

  “I hate you,” she giggled once she could find her voice.

  “Oh yeah?” Still hard, still nowhere near his breaking point, he gave her a teasing drag of his cock. She was soaked. “Let’s see if I can make you hate me again.”

  Challenge flared deep in her eyes. Usually, once she came that hard, she was done. “You couldn’t.”

  “Daring me will only make me try harder.” He tugged at the zipper of her hoodie, skimming his fingers underneath to tease at her bare breasts. Macy’s eyes closed dreamily. Spreading the jacket aside, he bared one nipple to his sight, dipped his head to flick his tongue across the tight peak. Deep inside, her pussy clutched at him anew. “Oh, I think I could.”

  Rain pattered against the windows, which were already fogged up. Macy’s hand rested atop his shaved head, stroking as he shifted his attentions to her other nipple. He licked and sucked and nibbled until she was ready again, growing restless beneath him, arching into his mouth, rocking her hips to take him deeper even though he denied her any real movement yet.

  “Okay,” she finally said on a soft chuckle, “I give in. You totally could.”

  “Does that mean you don’t want me to?”

  “You’re going to be the death of me, you know that?”

  “Nah. You’re young and healthy, baby. You haven’t killed me yet, so I think we’re both gonna hang in for a while.”

  Laughing, she hugged him close. Putting his cheek to hers, he moved inside her, gentle, leisurely movements. Outside, the rain slowed, its furor spent while Ghost’s gradually built. Still, he held back, even while his pulse thundered in his ears and he was so hard it hurt, instincts screaming to fuck her hard until he exploded. He lifted his head and gazed at her, finding her in the same sensuous distress.

  “Are you okay?” he asked, meaning it in so much more than a physical sense. He only wanted to know she felt safe, loved, happy.

  “I am,” she whispered, and he believed she’d understood the depth of the question. He hoped. There was nothing left to do but give her everything. Kissing her deeply, Ghost shuddered through his own release, pulling her with him.

  In the quiet moments after, while the only sound was their breathing and the last drops of rain on the roof, she said, “Seth?”

  “Hmm?”

  “I want a baby.”

  He’d already known, of course�
�she’d wanted to go off birth control, after all. But hearing it put so plainly, hearing the ache in her voice, undid something in him. He lifted his head and smoothed the hair back from her forehead. Her eyes were uncertain as they searched his, as if she’d been unsure of what he might say. A grin broke across his face. “Yeah?”

  Macy nodded, her breath hitching. “I do. How do you feel about it?”

  He only knew he wanted to make her happy—and she’d told him from the start that kids would be a part of that deal. Macy wanted to be a mom, she always had, and she deserved to be.

  “I see the look in your eyes when Brian and Candace are around with Lyric,” he said. “You light up.”

  “They’re so happy.”

  True. But they’d gone through hell, too. Ghost and Macy had babysat for them while Brian was in the hospital recovering from an assault last year. Macy had loved every minute of the baby time; even jumping up for feedings and diaper changes at two in the morning hadn’t fazed her. And Ghost had to admit, holding and feeding little Lyric had stirred a few fatherly feels in him, too. Poor little man almost had to grow up without a dad when Brian got attacked, and Ghost knew how that felt from having lost his own parents before he could form adequate memories of them.

  It wasn’t something he wanted to see any kid go through. Ever. He remembered looking down into that baby’s innocent eyes and vowing to fill that role for him as best he could if that was the hand they got dealt. Thank God it hadn’t been. Brian had recovered, good as new.

  At the core of it all, though, was one almost paralyzing fear, the same one that had gripped him when his ex, Raina, had come to him with news that she was pregnant. She’d lost their baby, but memories of the funk he’d walked around in for weeks were still vivid. “What if I’m a shitty dad?”

  “Please. You’ll be an amazing dad. Besides, you’ll have me. We’ll be a team.”

  That was so undeniably true. Parenting a kid with Macy would be at the opposite end of the spectrum from parenting with someone like Raina. An idea filled with hope versus one filled with dread.

  Still beneath him, Macy licked her lips and glanced up at him uncertainly. “I kind of thought I might already be pregnant, but I took a test and it was negative.” She rushed that last bit out, as if she was afraid he might have an immediate breakdown at the news. It was only the disappointment in her eyes that broke something in him.

  “Aw, babe,” he said gently, touching her cheek. “You should’ve told me.”

  “I know. I was so excited and nervous, I thought I would see if there was anything to freak out over before I freaked you out.” She chuckled sadly.

  “That’s what’s been bothering you, then?”

  “Yeah, a little.”

  No, it was a lot. He knew her better than that. “Well, maybe…” With a sheepish smirk, he glanced down to where their bodies were still joined and raised his eyebrows meaningfully. Maybe they’d just accomplished the deed a few minutes ago.

  Macy grinned but shook her head. “Nah, I doubt it. It’s not the right time for me.”

  Gently pulling from her body, he opened his mouth to reply that she should tell him when it was, and they would go at it like rabbits. But his phone buzzed in the back pocket of the jeans hanging loose around his ass. With a growl of frustration, he was prepared to let it go to voicemail, but with a kiss Macy told him, “It’s okay, go ahead.”

  Chapter Two

  When Ghost pulled out his phone and saw the name on the display, he immediately shoved the device back into his pocket. “Nah, I’ll get it later.” And then he realized how shad y that sounded.

  “Who is it?” Macy asked as he straightened in the seat, allowing her to sit up and tug her clothing back into place.

  It was Gus, his former bandmate, no doubt wanting to add his voice to Mark’s in begging him back to the group. He couldn’t not answer her, even if he wasn’t quite ready to explain the situation. “It’s Gus.”

  She turned incredulous eyes on him as she zipped her jacket and he zipped up his jeans. “The drug addict?”

  Jesus, leave it to her to cut to the heart of the matter. “Yeah.”

  “I didn’t know you talked to those guys anymore.”

  “I don’t, usually.” Except for one night several months back, when he was assisting Macy’s ex in the hunt for the drugged-out asshole who’d attacked Brian, Ghost hadn’t spoken to Gus since he quit In the Slaughter. But he’d needed him that night, because Gus knew all the drugged-out assholes and which rocks to overturn to find them.

  “I wonder what he could want,” she mused.

  Sighing, Ghost turned his attention out the window. The rain was a soft, lazy patter now, the kind that made you want to slip under the sheets and doze until it was over. Despite that desire, he felt jittery, disconsolate. He bounced one knee and felt Macy’s gaze on him. Finally, he turned to meet it, figuring there was no time like the present.

  “I’ve sort of been invited back for a gig.”

  “Oh, Seth…” Trailing off, she let her head meet the back of the seat. “You aren’t considering it, are you?”

  “Funny part about it is…yeah, I am.”

  “I don’t like it.”

  “I didn’t think you would.”

  “You know that, but you’re still considering it?”

  “I thought you would at least hear my case before you rendered a verdict.”

  She shrugged, suddenly seeming very interested in picking at a fingernail. “Okay. Begin.”

  “Now? You haven’t given me time to build my argument.”

  Giggling, she reached over and put her hand on his, her slender fingers giving his a squeeze. “When would it be?”

  “He said three weeks from now.”

  “Where?”

  “Austin. Same place you came to that night…you know.” He scratched his head with his free hand, cringing inwardly.

  “Oh, Jesus! This keeps getting worse. Would she be around? She moved back there, didn’t she?”

  “Honestly, babe, I don’t know where Raina is. Out of my life, that’s for damn sure. But whether or not she’s still in Austin, or wherever the fuck she went…I have no clue. Don’t wanna know, don’t care.”

  “I know that, but I can damn well guarantee you she cares where you are.”

  “I think you scared her off me.”

  “And I think seeing you again would set it all back in motion. It’s too risky.”

  Maybe she was right. Still, it grated to think of missing an opportunity he wanted because of an unrelenting ex he didn’t give a shit about. “It’s done. She would know right away she doesn’t have a shot. I really don’t think there’s anything to worry about, Mace.”

  “You know what she did…what she almost made you do.” He wasn’t likely to forget. He’d been drunk off his ass, missing Macy so bad it was a physical pain in his chest, and Raina had tried to seduce him in a back office of the venue when he was only semiconscious. Macy had walked in at a very inopportune moment. Ghost still wanted to unzip his own skin and shed it whenever he thought of her seeing him like that.

  They sat silently for a moment, lost in ugly memories. Finally Macy said, “It would drive me crazy sitting here worried about you.”

  “Hey, wait a minute,” he cut in. “You would come, too.”

  She looked at him in surprise. “I would, huh?”

  “Hell yes, you would. You never got to see me perform before I quit.”

  “Don’t do this on my account.” She nudged his arm. “You serenade me all the time; that’s all I need.”

  “Come on, babe,” he goaded, “don’t you want to see me in action?”

  Grasping his chin, she made him look her in the eyes. “That action I just got? That’s the only action I care about.”

  “I think you’d get a kick out of it. We could invite Brian and Candace, see if they could get a sitter for the night. It would be fun. Plus,” he added, reaching up to take her hand and pull it to his lips
. “There’s that little matter we need to work on. Come with me and we’ll work on it day and night. All weekend. On the trip there, on the trip back, and every spare minute in between.”

  Her eyes widened. “Are you seriously bribing me with baby-making sex?”

  “Bribing you? No. I’m negotiating .”

  Suddenly, though, she pulled away, severing all contact with him, and simply faced forward with a frown. “I’m just really confused as to why you seem to want to do this so much. I thought you’d left all that behind. Happily . So please understand why I’m taken aback.”

  “I do understand. I was taken aback, too. My first impulse was to tell Mark to stick it when he called and asked. But…I couldn’t say the words. I did love it, you know. I loved playing, I loved the music. It’s the people I had a problem with, but I figure, dealing with them for a few weeks is a small price to pay to do something I love again.”

  “Will one gig lead to two, and then three, and then suddenly you’re back in for good?”

  He shook his head. “Nah.”

  “Is it possible?”

  “I guess any fucking thing is possible. But it isn’t likely, and I’m not counting on it.”

  “I don’t like it,” she said firmly, repeating her earlier verdict. “I saw some of the things that were going on in that place when I was there.”

  “Just because you saw things going on doesn’t mean I’ll be doing them. I’m not gonna fuck up what we have, baby. I was on the road to Fuckupsville for the entirety of my life. Now I’m off, and I like the scenery over here much better.”

  “Then…why do you need to go back there? Even for a night?”

  He really didn’t have an answer for that. So he kept his mouth shut, because his mouth had the ability to get him into trouble he wasn’t looking for.

  “Is this because you’re feeling trapped?” she asked.

  “What?”

  “We’ve barely been married six months, and you want to go back to things you left when we first started seeing each other. It’s freaking me out, I’m sorry. Like maybe you think you made a mistake or—”